Monday, January 7, 2013

It's Time to Take Care of Yourself - Here's How.

Have you ever felt weary, so weary that your limbs feel heavy, your bones ache and your brain is tired of thinking so hard? 

You don't know where that feeling came from or when it began. 

You know it has been lurking, sending you subtle messages that you are so damn tired you need to stop.

But you didn't listen....

You couldn't for a multitude of reasons.

Because your children needed you.
Your work needed you.
Your spouse needed you.

Your life demanded that you turn up and be present for parties and community events and school meetings and family trauma and friends' crises and so you responded to each and every one.

But when your body needed you -called out to you through aches and fatigue and pain and tears - did you listen?? - NO? 

Were you kind to yourself, like you are to others? - NO?

Did you stop and listen with the care and thoughtfulness and gentle understanding as you would for people who come to you? - NO?

Well it's time,.....

Time to take care of yourself and I don't mean, pay lip service by having an early night, (although that might be a good way to start.)

I mean you need to take the time to take care of all the things you have not done for yourself, because you have been taking care of everyone else.

It's time to moisturize/massage your feet/back/limbs.
It's time to take lots of rejuvenating walks
It's time to take slow deep breaths and say NO to some of the commitments, demands, requests and expectations.

It's time to think about your own goals, your own health and well-being and your own happiness in order to be there for everyone else. 

It's a prescription called self-care and I am going to take some of my own medicine. 

How about you?

Please let me know what you are going to do and share this post for me. In the meantime I'm off to the Caribbean. I'll send you a post(card!)

Take care of yourselves.



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  1. I wish you were really going to the Caribbean...and I wish I could come along..:)

    1. Well it's certainly something to work towards and yes you should come too! In the meantime I have been moisturizing my feet. Have you? That's TWO stepS in the right direction ...(PUN INTENDED)

  2. Hi Gilly I so totally agree with you. Reading this makes me feel sad because its a realization that I am taking myself for granted at some point. being there for others is good but yes you are right, we have to keep our very own well-being at first hand to be able to provide good service to others. if we don't we will be one of those who will need and just waits to be helped out.

    I'd love a post card from the Caribbean.. how about I send you one too from Shanghai?

    1. Hi Maria Ana,
      I know from our interactions that you are a very caring person and I think people who care for others most would hate to need others to take care of them. That's why getting health checks that have been put off are so important as well as doing things that fill you up positively. That takes some self reflection. Actually asking "What do I need?" is not a question I think natural caregivers consider very often. But it really is the first step.

      I am only getting to the Caribbean in my imagination at the moment but it is truly on my list of to dos.But in the meantime I'll send you a postcard from DC. Direct message me your address or email me. :-)

      Enjoying our conversations!


    2. ohhh woww!! that is awesome! Okay ill DM you in twitter my address. ha ha ha send me yours too, Ill send it tomorrow. I am catching up in my writing this days.. you know sometimes long holidays create a mental gap. he he he.

      I feel you and I agree with all your perspectives here. I learnt from my experience and Ill make sure that Ill comply with the health checks scheduled for me this year. You know when I was hospitalized I felt bad, not actually for myself but most for my husband, who had to leave for work and attend to me 24/7. he lacked sleep, missed his meals and all that. And I dont want that to happen again.. ever.

      Stay strong there and cheers to your family. Let's all stay healthy this 2013.

    3. Thanks MariaAna,

      I will look for your DM. Take care and good luck with all the changes in your life!
      Keep me posted.


  3. Hi Gilly,
    Name the place and we'll meet for a walk!
    Judy P.

  4. Hi Judy,
    Sounds like a plan. I'll email you!

  5. Dear Gilly,
    I agree! Staying healthy includes doing what we enjoy. Even just brief preludes into a feeling of self-awareness is enough to strengthen one's sense of purpose and make it harder to turn away from our own needs. I found a book over the summer at the home of a very clever woman...called The Artists Way; A Spiritual Guide to Higher Creativty by Julie Cameron. She offers detailed guidance on how to pay attention to your higher creative self. No art background required.

    Thanks for the reminder...

    1. Dear Jessie,
      I love that book. My friend Ofra recommended it to me a few years ago. I must take it out and read it again.

      Yes I think self awareness can lead to self-care and vice versa. Sometimes I think it is frightening for people to take that close a look at their own lives though and numbness seems preferable to feeling as does focusing on others' needs.


  6. Awesome article! It's important to take time for ourselves - it really is.

    I just don't have any time.

    1. Hi Lisa -I know what you mean...I also feel that way. But I have found even something small. such as sitting for 5 minutes with a soothing hot drink or a few minutes in the car taking some slow deep breaths before getting out of it to run an errand can make a difference. let me know if you manage to carve out a few minutes for yourself and what you do!
      Thank you so much for leaving a comment.