Monday, June 4, 2012

The Queen's English

The longer I live away from England, the more patriotic I get. I hung our British flag outside our front door for the Queen's Diamond Jubilee which in case you were unaware, was this past weekend. I am more obsessed with tea, English chocolate, British television, films and novels than ever before and I am an avid Daily Mail fan (mainly for the pictures of royalty!) Looking at the UK from a distance the rose coloured* spectacles, only get rosier.
I think about the gorgeous English countryside but forget that it is all the rain that makes it so lush. I pine for Marks and Spencer and do not think about how expensive everything is (particularly with the exchange rate) and I miss my friends from my school days and then remember that many of them don't live in London any more.


But living in the USA and still having a British accent impresses the natives and now after 11 years I speak American fluently too, so I am bilingual. I know biscuits are cookies, a nappy is a diaper and braces are on your teeth -they do not hold up your trousers (pants). in fact braces would be called suspenders here and I am not going into what suspenders are for in England. I even know you cannot lay a table in this country or you could be charged with indecency. (Here you set the table.) 


There have been many books written about Americans trying to understand the Brits and vice- versa and one by  American, Sarah Lyall called The Anglo Files details her experiences living in London. Malcolm Gladwell says "The Anglo Files should be handed out, as a public service, in the immigration line at Heathrow." One of my favourite* stories in the book illustrates how Ms Lyall has truly morphed into a British person. She describes falling down the stairs at the hairdresser, dislocating her shoulder and whilst in the worst pain she has ever felt, lying in a heap on the floor, she  registers only one emotion -embarrassment. As an example of true British understatement and qualifying every statement, she tells how she said  "Sorry" in a meek voice. Then "I think I'm in a bit of pain and I might possibly need an ambulance."


There is no doubt that being a foreigner trying to make yourself understood in what you thought was a language you spoke fluently, is an incredibly humiliating experience. One of my first forays to the bank in the USA, nearly bought me to tears. I stood at the window and asked to pay-in a cheque (spelt check here). I kid you not, the woman, all of 22 years old, looked at me as though I had come from another planet and was speaking in code. I asked 3 times if I could pay in the cheque*, getting more and more flustered as even the words I thought I'd known since I was two seemed to escape me. She looked at me blankly without offering any encouragement or at least trying to guess what I might need as I waved the cheque back and forth in front of her. Finally I almost shouted (remember I am British) just take the bloody cheque and put it in my account.
"Oooh!" she said "You mean deposit and I love your accent. Are you Australian?"  
AAAAGH DEPOSIT!!!  YES! DEPOSIT MY CHEQUE. I was so exhausted from feeling like an Australian alien, I went home and drank 3 cups of English tea.


Now, we have changed banks and the employees  are a much more worldly crew. And  of course I am seasoned and ask to deposit my cheques. I always stand in line (not a queue) and sometimes I even say  "Have a nice day" at the end of my banking visit. But....I still go home and drink a cup of English Tea with milk and I hope the Queen did the same when she got off the barge after her wet, grey boat trip down the Thames to celebrate her jubilee.


Many Happy Returns Your Majesty. Have a nice day Ma'am!


Have a brilliant week.


Gilly


*In honour of the Queen I am spelling everything Her way.




Please email me at gilly@bringingbooksofcomfort.org or leave a comment on this post below. I'd love to have your feedback.
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22 comments:

  1. Keep spelling everything the Queen's English way - you are still a Brit, after all.

    And laying the table probably wouldn't get you in trouble. But if I were to tell you at shul that "I'll knock you up this afternoon" and were overheard, I'd be in a lot of trouble.

    I believe it was Sir Winston who said something to the effect that we are two countries divided by a common language.

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  2. Funny! Yes the longer I am here the more it seems that way. I am still discovering differences in our language eleven years on.What's your favorite?
    Thanks so much for commenting.
    Gilly

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  3. Hi Gilly,
    I think you are giving Oprah a run for her money (American expression?)with your excellent book recommendations (Gilly's Book Club).
    Cheers,
    Judy P.

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    1. Thanks Judy! What a compliment! However I don't think I raise the books' standings in the New York Times Bestsellers List one iota. I'm so glad you are getting some book ideas.Please let me know if you have read anything you would recommend. I'm always looking for a new book....
      Thanks very much for commenting.
      Gilly

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  4. Your correspondent on the ground here in the UK can tell you that the country has gone Jubilee barmy. We have bunting (not sure if this is a US word or not), bonfires, buns and barges (floating ones not onion). I took the kids to the flotilla on the Thames to watch the boats go by - 1000 of them - in tribute to HM. Although we were 20m from the Thames the crowds were so deep and thick we did not see a single boat! However we watched the procession in the gently falling rain on a giant screen together with the huddled masses and felt proud of this mild-mannered, tolerant, semi-professional country. To end with true British understatement - we could live in many worse places!

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    1. Adam-Great to hear from you. I don't think they use the word barmy here either. In the Washington Post over the weekend there was a section in which British residents in the USA wrote about what Americans are missing out on by not being British. He felt bunting was their biggest loss! That about sums it up.
      Hope you'll continue to be my ground correspondent in the UK.We need your eyes and ears....
      Gilly

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  5. Replies
    1. Thank you Aviva-I'm glad you enjoyed it. Thanks for leaving a comment. I really appreciate it.
      Gilly

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  6. I love it. Funny. I noticed the flag on my run.

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  7. Thanks Corey.I'm glad you enjoyed it and you were a witness to my flying flag. Gilly

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  8. Tell you what, Gilly. We'll invite the Cannons for Sukkot, and you bring your flag (should be 3x5 feet), and I'll fly it while we dine in the Sukkah - I have two 26 foot bamboo poles, which usually fly US and Israeli flags.

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    1. Sounds like a brilliant plan.Thank you! Her Majesty would be proud. Gilly

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  9. Great post and I loved that favourite story. Keep on drinking the tea, and leaving half finished mugs everywhere! x

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  10. Well Sukey -you are now revealing my bad habits! Glad you enjoyed it. I hope you saw your pillow gift got top billing.Thank you fellow Brit.
    Gilly

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  11. My Aunt and Uncle emigrated to California from Scotland way back in the early seventies, so we have a lot of laughs about the language differences. My Aunt often tells us the story of her first day working in an office over there, when she asked her colleague if she could borrow their rubber. I think she blushed a lot when she was eventually given the eraser, along with an explanation of what a rubber was.

    Now when they come over here on vacation (as opposed to a holiday!), they are met with blank looks often as they are truly Americanized. (not sure if that is even a word!) But, like you, they still love a cup of tea!

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  12. Liz- Yes the English name for an eraser will get you a lot of raised eyebrows here! Do your Aunt and Uncle sound American to you now?To Americans I still have a British accent, but when I visit the UK my friends tell me I sound quite American. Must be all the American words and phrases I now use without thinking. My children sound completely American and wish they had British accents.
    Have a nice day!
    Gilly

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    1. When the come here they sound American at first, but that Scottish twang soon kicks in!

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  13. Hi Gilly. I am old friend of Johny's and I too live in the US now and crave my English PG tips, chocolate bars, birds eye custard and go to the beeb for my news before anything American. But then I also use all the same vocabulary and am forgetting how to say things in Brit speak. I find 2 weeks in England and I'm glad to get back here.

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  14. Hi Brian,
    Welcome to Brainstorm. Where in the USA are you? We love being tourists in England and then coming back here. I'd forgotten about custard and the other day I had a real craving for egg and tomato sandwiches. Not sure if that is quintessentially English,but they remind me of my childhood.
    Thanks very much for leaving a comment.
    Gilly

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  15. Hi Gilly.
    I'm in Westchester NY, we had little cucumber sandwiches for the Queens Jubilee at a beach party, I'd forgotten about those. Johnny and I were at Leeds together, say hello to him for me.
    Brian

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    1. Hi Brian,
      Love cucumber sandwiches. Such a British refined understatement of a sandwich! I will pass on your message. By the way, I'm curious...how did you find your way to this blog?
      Gilly

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