tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3363712305146749297.post2017036349538418256..comments2023-12-17T21:45:17.581-05:00Comments on Brainstorm: Finding Calm After an Emotional Storm: The Power of ValidationGilly Cannonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/18393339396656670745noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3363712305146749297.post-56345005730101162412014-05-08T20:22:53.198-04:002014-05-08T20:22:53.198-04:00Glad they did!!Glad they did!!Gilly Cannonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18393339396656670745noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3363712305146749297.post-78561934045291061992014-01-21T12:49:32.554-05:002014-01-21T12:49:32.554-05:00certainly does.and certainly they do.certainly does.and certainly they do.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3363712305146749297.post-62936117717384101902014-01-10T10:30:11.844-05:002014-01-10T10:30:11.844-05:00Such an interesting question Jo.
I think one or ...Such an interesting question Jo. <br /><br />I think one or two generations ago parents did not ask their children their opinions or how they felt about situations, like we do today. So validation was not part of conversation, to receive or to emulate.<br /><br />Dr Winch in the article I quote from, also explains that often those nearest to us are personally distressed themselves when we are in pain and want to diminish ( eg. 'it's their problem not yours', or ' don't let it get to you.') or problem solve quickly in the hope it will go away.So they may not be the best people to validate us.<br /><br />Finally, I also think there is a difference between self validation and validating others. The first is about self-esteem and the second is about empathy or sympathy for others.<br /><br />The good news is we can all learn to validate others, by staying quiet whilst they are telling their story and acknowledging their feelings BEFORE trying to problem solve.<br /> Does that make sense? Do any of these ideas resonate with you?<br /><br />GillyGilly Cannonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18393339396656670745noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3363712305146749297.post-15923082869421566642014-01-09T13:36:55.174-05:002014-01-09T13:36:55.174-05:00Maybe the skill of validation comes from your up b...Maybe the skill of validation comes from your up bringing. If your feelings are validated as a child then probably you will know how to validate others when you grow up. For whatever reason I was bought up to "get on with it" and I did/ have done that. Like Liz, I tend to be too quick. Do you think you need to know how to validate yourself before you can validate others? <br />This post ( along with others ) sit on my shoulder. <br />Thank you Gilly.<br />Jo Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3363712305146749297.post-17318847642755495592014-01-09T11:17:43.982-05:002014-01-09T11:17:43.982-05:00Thanks Liz -I think you do a great job of validati...Thanks Liz -I think you do a great job of validating. I think the order of how you respond to someone can make all the difference. By validating first, you have indicated that you understand what the person is feeling. Within that empathetic framework you can offer suggestions or solutions that may be more easily accepted. GillyGilly Cannonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/18393339396656670745noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3363712305146749297.post-86515002547893731762014-01-09T06:47:58.696-05:002014-01-09T06:47:58.696-05:00Thank you for this Gilly.
This is a great post. S...Thank you for this Gilly. <br />This is a great post. Sometimes I am maybe too quick at trying to 'help' rather than just say no wonder you feel down or anxious.Rambling Prosehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05465813762893479775noreply@blogger.com