My fingers are running over the computer keys, wondering where to begin.
I can hear Aron our 18 year old and Jacob our 12 year old murmuring together. Their words are not clear, but the filtering sounds are upbeat and conversational as they rise and fall in sync and at times are spotted with laughter. The two boys are inseparable at the moment, playing Minecraft together, strategizing, building, challenging, but mostly enjoying each other's company.
This scenario is particularly heartwarming, because in a few days Aron is going to college and Jacob will be home alone. (No other siblings to divert parental attention anymore.)
Each of us is dealing with this impending separation differently.....
Aron is ready. Ready for college, for new friends, for a change but as you'd expect somewhat anxious about this whole new world and life-phase he is entering. (But not ready, in as much as he has not packed one piece of clothing yet....)
Jacob is excited about his own new adventures in 7th grade but tearful about Aron leaving. He is well aware what this new phase means and he is trying to put on the brakes, slow the days and lap up the moments with this brother he adores. The other loved brother is already in college.
I have a pit in my stomach. This bittersweet feeling many parents have when one of their children is starting a new stage of their lives. I have loved Aron from the moment I saw him wrapped in blankets after his birth.( see what my wise Mum said about finding enough love for all your children.) He looked around his new world quietly with his big eyes and when they caught mine I was smitten.
And now waves of aching love sweep through me when he wonders into the kitchen hunting for a bagel or wraps his spaghetti arms around me in an unexpected hug, as I sit at the table trying to write.
I cannot believe he is now almost 6 feet tall, a firefighter and EMT and certainly doesn't need me watching over him. But watch I will, quietly (and sometimes not so quietly) and from afar.
After all - Once a parent always a worrier......!
And if he has listened to any words of wisdom(!) I have tried to impart, here are some of what I hope he has heard and that I think we all wish our children to know.
1. Your family is there to support you and love you unconditionally (whether you like it or not). You get to choose your friends, so take your time and be sure to choose wisely.
2. Be a better version of yourself. Do not try to be like someone else.
|Sign at a Gym -Thx Abby Wynn|
3. Take risks with your ideas and thoughts and goals. Don't wait for things to be perfect.
4. Kindness cannot be measured and is priceless to give and to receive.
|Random Acts Of Kindness asked "How do you define Kindness?"|
5. School and College are ordered. Life is messy and that's OK. It's how you respond to the messiness and build resilience, that is the making
6. Stay connected and true to your code of ethics, core beliefs and faith. These give you a framework and guidance for living a worthwhile, enriching communal and personal life.
And remember to relax and do things that make you happy after you have CALLED/TEXTED/EMAILED ME.
Which piece of advice do you want your kids to have heard loud and clear?
Good luck to all of you sending your kids off to the first week of a new school or pre-school, kindergarten, grade school or college and hugs to all you Moms and Dads and caregivers who are holding your breath and wishing your loved ones a happy, healthy and successful year.
Let me know how the transitions go....Thinking of you all.
PS: If you have a twitter account please remember to join me for a tweetchat to raise awareness of chronic pain and Trigeminal Neuralgia on Twitter 8/27 8.00pm ET #treatdiarieschat with Treatment Diaries